A Moving Story

We have recently been down the journey to relocate.  From a quiet life on the outskirts of Warkworth and rural living to a move to town living 818 km away and on another island- the sunny South Island town of Blenheim. Mainstream thought tells me that this is one of life’s most stress inducing experiences. Just Google “moving” and see how it is perceived to be one of life’s greatest stress inducing events. So as I reflect on the experience, which is now firmly wedged into the thought processes of my mind,  I wonder what evidence there is of this stress from our big move?

Of course we had to find a house and have a buyer for our property, but it seems that was the easy part. During that period nothing had to change. We were just in a holding pattern, a state of waiting, not unlike beginning a holiday and the wait time at the airport.  In the end, the stress came up the scale, and yes- even for a practiced relaxer like myself, stress was at a maximum in the days after we had sold but before we have arrived. If I had to identify the moment when I first realised that stress was winning it would have been in the growing arguments between all of us on what can be moved, thrown away, given away or recycled before the movers came.

Buying and selling at the same time means two sets of deals where things could go wrong. Two sets of worry from two sets of solicitors about any issues that might arise which could derail the whole process. Constantly thinking that we mustn’t get too attached to the place we wanted to buy in case it all falls through. But then again, we didn’t want to buy just any old place, we wanted to love the place we bought. After all, it’s not often we make that size of purchase. We saw our new house for 15 minutes as part of a whirlwind 3 day tour of 16 properties over the whole of our new town. It is funny to think that even on the day we took possession, we had no idea where the laundry was. We had only seen the house once in person. I’ve spent longer deliberating over bedsheets or kitchen dishes.

When the agreements went unconditional the tension then began to spread like wildfire through our family. The list went from- sell house and buy house- to nine pages of lists of tasks that needed to be done before, up to and including moving day and the two weeks after that. We are still in the final throws of this big life challenge but with conviction I can say that we are winning over chaos, tape, and boxes.

For the most part, we rallied together as a family and set out on a great adventure to our new abode. Today the sun is shining, the sky crisp and bright and we have done exactly as we set out to do. We have a house we love, a location as close to town as we have ever been and the lifestyle we were focussed on when we set the plan in motion 10 months ago.  Yes, it has been stressful in small peaks but overall, this move has been pretty smooth sailing.  If you are moving, just remember to give yourself enough time to sort your affairs and keep in mind that time continues to pass making your experience a memory before long.

For any of my past clients, Skype sessions are available and you are welcome to contact me via email any time.

Are you disappointing Miss Daisy?

Impotence is more common than you think, and you are not alone.  In fact, most men experience periods of impotence at some stage throughout their lives.  Basically, you are a few parts shy of an erector set if you have a consistent inability to sustain an erection for the purposes of sexual intercourse, or the inability to achieve an ejaculation, or both. You may have a total inability to achieve an erection or ejaculation, an inconsistent ability to do so, or a tendency to sustain only very brief erections.  

It has been noted that the risk of impotence increases with the age of the man and that the rate of impotence is four times higher in men over 60 when compared to men in their 40’s (Journal of Urology (2000;163:460-463).  

There is some research that indicates that there are both physical and psychological causes.  In most cases it is hard to determine the separation between these two as they are often linked, and so an approach that looks at the whole is needed to get a “firm” result.  

Clinical hypnotherapy with Scope Hypnosis aims to address some of the common contributors which are fatigue and stress.  Excessive alcohol consumption must also be addressed and hypnotherapy can help get to the underlying reasons for this dependency, thus helping you to rise to the occasion.  Men who are working in stressful jobs and become overworked and tired may fall into bad habits with diet and exercise, and research shows that lifestyle factors play a role in healthy sexual outlooks. Psychological problems that contribute to impotence also include depression and relationship worries. To be free to be yourself under the covers you need to make positive changes within your mind to support your body. Hypnosis is a very powerful, yet underutilised state of mind that can help you achieve your goals.

SKYPE sessions are confidential and private while saving you travel time- no one has to know- I encourage you to seek help today and feel empowered tomorrow.

Lisa Wheeler
Go to www.scopehypnosis.com and download your free 5 minute daily de-stress!

Who is a hero?

Are you a Hero?

This week I witnessed an act of pure heroism when a young boy in the local swimming pool got into trouble and a bystander jumped into the water, fully clothed, to save the boy.

Many people would have called the lifeguard on duty, but this man knew there wasn't a moment to spare and took action instantly.   

This led me to thinking about our subconscious mind and how it is always working for our greater good.  In the split second that the bystander noticed  the child in trouble in the pool, he didn’t weigh up the pros and cons of jumping in, his subconscious mind took over and went straight into fight or flight response.  

Thoughts  about how uncomfortable he was going to be in soaking wet clothes,  or the wallet/phone in his pocket went by the wayside  so he could propel himself into action and rescue a child from potential drowning.  

This is the beauty of our mind and body relationship. In a fraction of a  second his muscles, sinews , and thought processes all worked together fluently to pull the child safely from the water. 

We have true heros in our world and then we have everyday heros amongst us and yet we all just look like ordinary people- there is a hero in all of us given the right circumstances!

We all function with this ability deep inside our subconscious mind. 

At times our fight or flight kicks in when we don’t need to rescue anyone .  It's at times like these that the help of a clinical hypnotherapist is useful in reprogramming the subconscious mind for more appropriate actions.

At Scope Hypnosis we help you to always act and react like a hero! www.scopehypnosis.com

Lisa Wheeler

6 Key Points to Happiness from Scope Hypnosis

Happiness.... Just a simple word and yet if you don't have enough of this feeling the quality of your life suffers greatly. Here are a few tips to help you increase the happiness in your life.

1: The half-smile -  Smiling by just uplifting the corners of your mouth will increase feelings of happiness and wellness as this action also creates a release of positive endorphins and proteins into your body.  Your cells love these positive endorphins so next time you are feeling a bit worked up just try this technique for a quick release of positive feelings.

2: Improve your ability to relax -  With targeted relaxation we gain more beneficial endorphins and proteins to feed our cells and create feelings of happiness.

3: Exercise - We’ve all heard it before- yes we gain many positive benefits from exercise. It has been shown time and time again that our brains release proteins and endorphins that make us feel happier when we exercise.

4: Time for your mind - Use meditation or hypnosis to take yourself from the place where you are to where you desire to go.  Take 5 minutes everyday to use these techniques to reframe your life and get you on the path you desire.

5: Mini massage - Give yourself a head massage. Take 3 minutes to push, pull and rub your head to get the blood flowing to all the areas of your brain.  Massage will increase the blood flow to your head thereby revitalizing your brain and body and helping you to relax.

6: Sleep more -  It is easy to say

that we should sleep more but just going to bed a 1/2 hour earlier can have a dramatic effect on how you function throughout the day.  The right amount of sleep offers you more protection from negative emotions and aspects of life which compromise your happiness.

Want to chat about this article? Send me an email with your thoughts and remember to sign up for your free 5 minute relaxation track at www.scopehypnosis.com

Child Abuse is Rife in NZ

Let's stop this crime now!

I am shocked that in this day and age so many  N.Z. children are still victims of abuse.  Despite public awareness and the anti-smacking laws, an astonishing number of children are put in harms way, are neglected or are physically, emotionally or sexually victimised.  Sadly, the majority suffer at the hands of the people they trust most, their caregivers.

New Zealand holds the 5th worst child abuse record out of the 31 countries in the OECD.

 http://www.childmatters.org.nz/ reports that one child is killed every five weeks in this country and that most of these are under five years old with the biggest group being babies under one year old. These deaths are, in 90% of cases, caused by someone the child knows.

The clients I see come from all walks of life; some university educated and some from the working classes, but they all have one thing in common:  they lack confidence.  Adults who have lived young lives as victims of abuse need qualified support to tame the damage that has been done in the past. We know that children who have lived with abuse have an increased chance of living problematic, anti-social lifestyles in the future through delinquency, teen pregnancy, low academic achievement, drug use and mental health problems.  We also know that if you have been abused in the past you have an increased risk of become an abuser. Help is here: near or far Scope Hypnosis supports clients to make positive changes in their lives.

Children are never the cause of the abuse.  No matter what the child’s behaviour the responsibility lies solely with the adult to respond appropriately. Inflicting physical punishment, verbal abuse or responding sexually to a child is a crime.  If you find it difficult to parent your child without violence, or you cannot shield them from abuse, I urge you to seek help.

Clinical Hypnotherapy with Scope Hypnosis will start you on the right track.

If you have experienced abuse in your own life or you know someone struggling with these issues, let us help. We can work together to change these horrific statistics which the lovely clean green NZ wants to hide from the world.

www.scopehypnosis.com

Sex and the sexes

Men and Women and Sex

Men say their partners don’t want to have sex, have less libido, and are not initiating being intimate.  Why? 

Men and women differ in many areas and sexual desire is just one. Some say these two groups have equivalent levels of desire but that it is the factors behind desire that vary greatly. 

For woman the connection with the mind plays a very significant role in her desire for sex.  For men the physical draw is the main driving force. 

According to Psychology Today “Sexual desire in females is both more complex and more fragile than it is in males—less tied to biology, more linked to psychology.” 
It seems to me, we could use this statement to refer to much about the differences between men and women.

In some studies, men say they think about sex at least once a day whereas only 25% of women say they think about it with this frequency.  For women, their desire is related to environment and context. 

Work stress, relationship issues, other stress factors and declining hormones all impact a woman’s craving for sex.  Women’s sexual desires fluctuate over the years, and during the month in comparison to men who maintain a reasonable steady desire.  

Antidepressant medications are known to reduce libido and these medications are being prescribed more and more in our current society.  

If you are on antidepressant medication which is resulting in a loss of libido, ask yourself if there may be other options for managing your emotional state besides drugs. 

These drugs affect more than just your depression. Their use may contribute to problems within your relationships due to lack of libido. 

In this case, it’s a choice between two evils: depression and limited desire for sexual contact.   But there are other options you just need to seek them out.

Low libido isn’t a problem on its own.  The only time you need help with low sexual libido is if it is causing you distress.   Or if it is causing distress within your relationship.  

Men and women differ significantly in the factors influencing sexual desire; that’s normal. Accepting the differences between  couples and their desires is just one aspect of managing a successful relationship.

If you want an increase in your desire for intimacy then help is available through the use of clinical hypnotherapy.   

If you want your partner to have an increase in their desire for intimacy than look at what the surrounding factors may be in reducing their current desire. 

If it’s your man and you want to increase his desire find some ways to reduce his stress. If it’s your woman and you want to increase her desire remember helping out to reduce the load goes a long way to creating a healthful happy sexual woman. 

We, at Scope Hypnosis, create individual treatment programmes based on your unique needs to help you increase your desire and live a happy life.

Subconscious Influence and Advertising Depression

The influence of the subconscious mind is deeply embedded in the unknown of our  responses and behaviours. Take for example the science behind the colour of medication in pill form.  For treating depression research has shown that as humans our subconscious programming plays a strong role in our perception of how well a pill will actually work for us. The shape and the colour of the pill have a significant influence over its effectiveness. It’s been shown that yellow placebo pills are the most effective  placebo form for treating depression whereas a placebo in the form of a red pill will often cause the patient to be more alert and awake. If anxiety is the issue you take a green pill and if you’re developing stomach ulcers due to your anxiety then white pills are most effective. None of these pills have any active ingredients. They are merely placebos. This is the interplay between your subconscious programming and the world around you.

When research has shown that the colour of a tablet can have a profound effect on its influence within the body even when the tablet is a placebo, the topic to ponder in this blog post is how can we possibly believe that www.depression.org.nz, of which John Kerwin is a spokes person, has honourable intentions for us. Surely our influential subconscious mind is not being educated to look at this website to find help but more to suggest that we all suffer from depression and that help is available in the form of drugs from our medical practitioners.

The website goes as far as to say “The World Health Organisation estimates that by the year 2020, depression will be the second most common cause of ill health and premature death worldwide”.  So depression is growing and I contend that’s because as a society we are feeding and watering it.  There is no mention of growth of the other 4 major mental illness categories: Anxiety Disorders, Schizophrenia, Psychotic Disorders, and Eating Disorders.  There is no doubt that with the focussed advertising that is being done for depression we will be steadily spreading this illness across our society. Advertising is a very powerful medium designed to influence and convince us that we need the item being advertised, will benefit from the item being advertised, and we should take the next step and purchase this item to help improve our lives. Is this not the same as advertising the state of depression and couching it as an educational tool?

Some might say that antidepressants are a total scam. Yes, living in a depressive state takes a toll on your life and the availability of antidepressants from GP’s is wide spread.  Many patients taking these pills will claim they have worked well yet there have been many studies to show that using a placebo will have the same effect without any chemical side effects. Doctors, pharmaceutical companies, and chemists all downplay these studies yet use the knowledge to add placebo effects to drugs through the use of shape and colour.

In my work, as a Clinical Hypnotherapist, the influence of the subconscious mind on wellness is paramount and all too many of my clients are taking or have been on antidepressant drugs.

I’m going to come up with a placebo vaccine for depression and give it to the whole nation...

Let's be well!

Lisa Wheeler

Clinical Hypnotherapist

www.scopehypnosis.com